yes I live!

Not much going on. Still at that job, tho the guy voluntarily Redid his schedule so I don't do showers, but that also means I won't get many shifts. Anything that requires strength is out. Sigh. I need a different income source.

Ofc I could actually get that new computer finally put together. It's been so hot up here, haven't made enough room in Bro's opinion.

maybe I should learn to drive the big disabled people truck. I hate driving but at least I'm facing some fears.

Like the express way. I hate it! But I get off work very late so I drove home on express way/highway at night for a month. And last week I took it *to* work for the first time.
I still hate driving. Ugh, where are all the boring desk jobs where I just type shit up?

Graduated! wait mrsa??

Wasn't easy either, what with uni messing things up to the very end. But I got a BA in religious studies, no idea what to do with such a degree, but at least I'm out. Got a job, though is hard job. My rule was "anything but retail" and well I found something but it is super hard in other ways. I'm a caregiver for a disabled man. He is not tiny. He is so physically disabled he can do nothing. There's a lift to get him into his chairs, bed etc, and his waist doesn't bend the full 90 degrees to sit and I definitely don't have the strength to pull him up. I think I pulled a few muscles of my own last night. I am sore today.

he is also a mrsa carrier which freaks me out. How easy is it to catch that? I have to shower the guy and last night water dripped from his arm to my eye while I tried to scrub his rear (shower chair has hole there). There are no sores on his arms, just dry skin, a scab of some sort on his leg though. How much danger am I in? Is mrsa like cold sores in that is only contagious sometimes?

Got my new computer last month but it is not together yet. It's so big I need to still make room and my floor is not large or well organized. Bro is talking about mounting stuff on my wall so computer can use a table. He doesn't want it on the floor. Uggghhhhh......

I hate being sick!

My throat is so sore I'm on a liquids diet and my nose so plugged I'm a mouth breather and I'm glad my lungs aren't tight but this damn spot in my throat keeps making me cough anyway. I'm living on Bolthouse Farms smoothies and milk and cough drops and nyquil and I constantly have to pee.... AND DAMN UNIVERSITY SENT ME A LETTER IN SNAIL MAIL THAT I DON'T QUALIFY TO GRADUATE AND OF COURSE THEY USE SNAIL MAIL BECAUSE CAN'T HAVE ME HAVING TIME TO FIX DHIT NO SIR YOU ASSHOLES THIS IS WHY I DROPPED OUT LAST TIME.

so yea that's my world right now. I am constantly tired so since I'm home for the day and passed my midterm I'm gonna skip homework and nap... again. But wow I am behind on homework.

also....

Watching my mom figure out her new phone is just so precious. Just showing her how there were more apps than just on her homepage. How to swipe to the next section. Her squeal was so cute. And ofc bitchaunt is still a bitch but Bro has discovered the harassment and is solidly there for Mom, constantly telling her what she is doing is removing barriers to my success(barriers which were started or made worse by bitchaunt). So she is starting to stand up to bitchaunt for the first time in her life. Maybe someday she'll finally tell bitchaunt to start helping with jailbird's bills.

whheeeeee!!!!!

I guess at some point Mom started feeling majorly guilty about the past year because she got me a laptop and new phone. Granted the laptop is the cheaper type and came with windows 8 ugh but the free upgrade to 10 seems to have worked. Now if only it had come with Word >:(

Mom got a smartphone too. It was a package deal for both phones thru my university so is in my name but her payment info.

I am back in school! Which is a huge part why Mom got so generous. And my old car died... and she got me a newer one. And I still have earmarked a chunk of financial aid to get a strong desktop so I can finally play Sims 3.

and I have an internship this semester, focusing on what pastors do. So while I am kinda back, I'm also busier than usual but while try to pop in more now that I can.

I still have the old baby smartphone that helped me this past year. It is truly falling apart and was replaced just in time but I'm all sentimental about it and once I type everything off (it's so old the transfer didn't take) I'm gonna wrap it up and keep it in the underwear drawer or something. Also on this new phone the text I type is suddenly huge compared to the editor box.

uugghh

Well the good news is my fin aid check finally came. Tho ofc it arrived before the long weekend of banks being closed. Sigh.

and in other news... car is going. The engine computer is dying, the old rotor brakes are failing, and I am now scared to drive my car. And the repairs would be more like retrofit replacements. In short,I can't afford to fix it anymore :(
it is now cheaper to get a new car. I am sad about it. I admit I must replace my car but I don't have to be happy about it!

I was also stuck at a "family gathering" at bitchaunt's. Not happy. Once again it was mostly her husband's friends and jailbird's kids. It was my idea to bring my youngest sister along, and it was hard to convince her to come. The dear girl honestly thought she would not be welcome because her mother was "the other woman" I see daddie dearest filled her head with nonsense.
guess what else daddie dearest did?
he took money out of his youngest daughter's social security to pay his own bills..... and then he told her about it and said he had to because her mother wasn't giving him enough money. He is using babysis as a weapon against stepmom.... just as he often used me and Bro against my Mom. Well weel stepmom did everything in her cconsiderable power to break up Mom's marriage and stepmom won. My Mom was financially ruined. So I don't feel sorry for stepmom at all. But I really feel sorry for babysis being manipulated and caught in the middle. It's not her fault her parents are assholes.

and computer died

Several days ago. I just got it back. Something about "load needed dlls for kernel" so seems at least is not hardware but I have no backup software to get the missing bits from. So I am annoyed. Mom is being very sweet bringing her laptop home for me but she wishes she didn't have to. Sis-in-law has offered her old laptop which is not as old as my old desktop but she got a laptop from her work and she can't go back to her old one anyway. Bro has to do a bit of work but school starts next week so I hope this goes fast. Am verry annoyed at school tho. They are demanding additional paperwork to get financial aid whiich would be understandable *but* uni waited until 2 weeks before class to tell me so now I'm scrambling. And ofc auntbitch is trying to be all nice. She did nothing to help at any time, she did not evven take that annoying 4am babysitting gig. And she & her dick husband were the only ones whose income would not have been affected, because they both live on the taxpayer dime. Ofc she did they "I babysit my granddaughter" but ofc she did not tell how the child lived in her same neighborhood. And I think that she should have housed him since her sacrifices would have been smallest. Her income would not have shrunk, she just didn't want to go to her son's house twice a week. I think she should buy my computer.