Samantha Ronson 101

Well I sent the email to the in-person crush and now I'm freaking out.
I also had a nerves-induced binge earlier. And having Reeses Chips Ahoy in the house did not help.
And now that I've hit Send on that email....I've got a very strong urge to go back downstairs and finish off those Reeses Chips Ahoy.
So in an effort to keep my shaking hands from shoveling crap into my big fat motuh...I'm gonna do a Samantha Ronson 101 post.

Samantha is the twin sister of Charlotte Ronson and the twins are the younger sisters of Mark Ronson, a DJ and producer who made Amy Winehouse's Back to Black album.
The 3 Ronson kids were all born in England, the children of Ann Dexter and Laurence Ronson. The parents divorced when the twins were very young, and only Mark remembers much of that time.
Ann won custody and brought her kids to the US when the twins were about 7 or 8. This was the first time the twins were allowed to wear jeans, and they were very excited. As little girls in England they had always worn smock dresses, not jeans!
Ann met Mick Jones of Foreigner and they fell in love, married, and added more kids. Mick has been Samantha's father-figure for the majority of her life and she regularly calls him Dad and adores him.
Samantha's brother Chris Jones is I think from an earlier relationship of Mick's. Alexander and Annabelle Dexter-Jones are definitely Mick and Ann's kids.
Ann and Laurence also became civil to each other for the sake of the kids, and Samantha is also close to her siblings on the other side of the Atlantic. Laurence married again, but I don't know the name of his wife or of all their kids. There's a Henrietta, David, and Joshua but that leaves 2 unaccounted for.

Yup...that's right. When step-siblings and half-siblings are all counted in, Samantha is one of 10 kids. Samantha has often said that 9 is her favorite number. Not a lucky number, just her favv. As far as I know she has never explained why 9 is her fav, but I suspect it's because she has exactly 9 siblings.

Ofc Mick being in Foreigner, well he had lots of buddies in the music and entertainment biz. Mark often had Robin Williams reading bedtime stories to him. Samantha would come down to breakfast and find her mom talking to Robert de Niro. She has always lived within the world of famous people. Her stepdad was Foreigner! The idea that she needed lindsay lohan to make her famous is completely fucking ludicrous.

Ann was a strict mom. She once changed the locks on Mark so she'd catch him if he broke his curfew. She grounded her kids a lot. She also didn't see why teens would need an allowance larger than about $20 a week. She figured if her kids were spending more than that, they were probably getting into things that they shouldn't. If they wanted more money, they had to go get jobs. Mark and Samantha got into DJing. Mark being older, he had a head start and paved the way. As he started getting into producing he would slide some of his DJing gigs to Samantha, which helped her get started. They're both with Roc Nation now, and it's funny how Roc Nation treats them like they're interchangeable.

I've already mentioned Samantha's songs in a much earlier post. I love her songs. She needs to practice guitar more and she needs to stop smoking, but I think her songwriting is already kickass. Sadly Samantha has shitty luck. Roc-a-fella went under and her debut album was never released. She's been reduced to selling her songs individually through itunes.
Her most famous song is Built This Way which was used in the movie Mean Girls.

Ana Regzig is a full time actress and model. I do not think Samantha is Regzig, but given Samantha's many connections, they *might* know each other.

I do wonder if Samantha is anorexic though. There are a few old pics of her being bone skinny, and then being slender but still fairly healthy.
But the most recent slender-but-healthy pics I've seen are from 2004. After that she met lindsay. I know I went ana as a coping mechanism. Maybe Samantha did too. The "rohan" dating months were filled with reports of constant fighting, and then videos of fights started appearing. Lindsay has also used her twitter account to accuse Samantha of doing drugs, of cheating, of lying, and of spitting on lindsay. In march 2009 there was a huge fight where lindsay broke Samantha's window. April 2009 was the famous lindsay getting banned from Charlotte's fashion event thing. I think Samantha asked her family for help. Damn near her entire family was there that night. And the next day the locks on Samanth's house were changed.
Samantha has been followed by paparazzi, been asked if she goes to a barber, been called a man, been accused of hitting lindsay.

Sounds like a really stressful situation to me. And Samantha is so skinny that when she sits, her kneecaps stick up.

At one of Charlotte's events Charlotte posted a pic she claimed was Samantha's liquid rider in full effect. And among the Fiji water and the Coca-Cola and the one bottle of Jack Daniels there was a pack of Ensure. The kind for muscle repair.
So Samantha is not Regzig. But she might still be anorexic. She likes to wear a lot of bracelets. I'm trying to keep an eye out for flashes of red, but the way she likes to have piles on her wrists, I might miss it.

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And once again I fell asleep before I hit Post. Why do I do that?